hi from colorado
well, it's christmas morning (afternoon, actually) and it
has been a nice day. maddie (the puppy) is absolutely
adorable and i can't believe how much i love her! i
followed her around with my camera all morning long to
try and take some cute photos of her. i don't even want
to say how many photos i took, but this one is one of
my favorites. could she be any cuter???
here's a photo of me & maddie, playing.... (actually,
maddie was trying to eat my fingers....).
*****
tonight is my last night here in colorado.... then i
am flying back to oakland for 2 nights, and on wednesday
the 28th i will leave very,
very early in the morning
for istanbul. i am freaking out. i keep reminding myself
that everything will be OK, but i know i won't feel like
any of this is really happening until i get off the
plane at ataturk international airport.
istanbul........ i miss you.
seni cok ozledim, canim.
happy holidays
i've been in colorado for a little less than a
week, spending time with my parents and the
various creatures that are running around the
house. they adopted a new puppy the day after i
arrived-- her name is maddie and she is a black
lab/golden retriever mix. she is absolutely
adorable! our last dog (actually, my only dog
prior to maddie) had to be put down 2 years ago
and it was tremendously sad. cleo had been a
part of our family for almost 17 years and was
one of the sweetest, most playful dogs i have
ever met. maddie seems to be adapting to her
new home very well.... and i am sure she will
be happy (and my parents will adore and spoil
her like they do all their animals!). lucky
dog.
istanbul, wait for me....
in a little over 2 weeks, i will return to istanbul....
i will fly from san francisco on the 28th, through chicago,
and will arrive (god-willing) in istanbul on the 29th.
i'm feeling a barrage of emotions.... from relief, to
happiness, fear, terror, bliss, hope, as just about every kind of emotion a person can experience is living within me right
now.
i don't know if it's the best decision, but for now,
it's the only decision i want to make. being in
california has reminded me of the things i love about
living in the US, but also about the things i hate --
the kind of lifestyle that i would really like to get
away from. i love my friends, i love my family, but
i have to go with my instincts and just see where this
leads.
i miss everything about istanbul. i miss ezan. i miss
the bosphorus, i miss riding in the dolmus, i miss my
students, i miss my friends, i miss buying fruit on
the corner outside the bakkal, i miss walking down
istiklal and people-watching, listening to the music
coming from the clubs, i miss hearing the familiar
sounds of turkish, of laughter, of children, of the
aygaz truck rolling down the street in the morning,
i miss the foghorns that somehow echo up to my
apartment in cihangir, i miss the black sea, i miss
ortakoy, i miss walking in the rain, i miss sitting
in the park, smoking the nargileh and reading fortunes,
i miss meeting outside of burger king, i miss
everything. i miss you, i miss istanbul.
