and autumn comes.
words, words, words
Originally uploaded by .......c.........
i'm sitting here in a sweater.
repeat: a sweater.
last night, it was 84 degrees (29 C) in my living room at 11:30pm at night. 84 degrees and humid. and as usual, i was sweating.
this morning, i woke up to a cold breeze, rain, and grey, cloudy skies. it seems that autumn has come suddenly to istanbul, a meteorological quick-change; i went to bed during a hot, mid-summer night, and woke up to welcome autumn and her grey, rainy skies.
i prefer autumn. it feels melancholy, but there's something beautiful about istanbul in rainy weather. it washes away the dust and heat of summer, soothes my heat-weary soul, and brings out the colors of the city: greys, greens, and the ever-changing blue of the bosphorus.
it's raining now.
there have been some bombings in turkey; in marmaris (okan is ok, thank God), in antalya, in mersin, and one in a far-off section of istanbul. it's the TAK (something related to the PKK) trying to destroy the tourist industry in turkey and gain attention to the kurdish struggle in the east. i can't really comment on the politics of the turkish/kurdish situation, but bombings i abhor. especially bombings near people i love. i'm sorry for the people who have been injured (or killed-- 2 in antalya) and i wish things like this didn't happen in turkey (or in the world). for people who are worried about me and my personal safety, i have to say..... i'm ok. i feel safe. everything's fine!
the brightest lamp in istanbul
the new streetlight
Originally uploaded by .......c.........
it's sunday morning and i am sitting here, as per usual, with my cup of coffee (filtered, not nescafe!).
i forgot that i am teaching some kind of shakespeare class today so last night i was searching for resources and links.... i should have done this days ago, but it snuck up on me. it's possible that no one will come, but i hate feeling unprepared.
i even dreamt about it.
anyway, i went to bed entirely too late and read far too much about shakespeare at 1:00am. now i am tired.
i also blame the new, gigantic light they installed yesterday outside our living room window. it's hanging over the street, but it's so bright i can't even look at it directly. it's like a small sun, shining like there's no tomorrow-- i think it made me lose track of time. aydin bey, our downstairs neighbor, came by and said "see! look at the new light! isn't it great!?" i leaned out the window and said, "evet. cokkkkk gunesli." (yes, it's verrrrry sunny) then i wished him "good day" (at 10pm) and he laughed at my little joke.
today: shakespeare. a visit to koc tas (the turkish version of home depot). more coffee.
heeeeeeat wave
it's too damn hot
Originally uploaded by .......c.........
i'm officially over the heat. not that it matters, as my check of the weather online revealed the following 14-day forecast: HOT. HOT. HOT. SUNNY. HOT. HUMID.
i'm dreaming of: water parks, swimming pools, walk-in freezers, ice, air-conditioning that works, giant fans, wind, swimming in rivers, ice cold lemonade......
in other news, there have been no more exploding breasts (implants-- see previous post). selin is coming back today, aysu's brother is coming by today or tomorrow with goodies from our friends in seattle, my new friend laura is coming next week, victory day (august 30!) is a holiday, and then--- SEPTEMBER! i can't believe it.
"my breast exploded"
today was a weird day.
my last class of the day was with 3 people, 1 of which is this really interesting woman. she's a tennis pro of some kind and is really aggressive with everyone. most of the people are annoyed/aggravated by her, but she doesn't really get to me....
so this afternoon i was wrapping up the class and suddenly, she apologizes to me:
tennislady: "sorry i am so bad. i don't feel well. i had to take some pills."me: "it's ok, don't worry about it. i hope you feel better!"tennislady: "i will. i had surgery this morning."me: "really?"tennislady: "yes, my breast exploded yesterday. it was really funny."me: "!!?!?!"she then proceeded to pull down her shirt and show us all her the bandages that covered her left breast. i felt like i was having an out of body experience-- PUT YOUR EXPLODED BREAST AWAY, LADY!!! ahhhh!
welcome, herbs.
in the past 2 weeks, i have planted cilantro, catnip, and basil. i don't have a garden, but the windowsill is providing an excellent place to keep plants and (fingers crossed!) successfully grow them. i have never had a green thumb, so the fact that my first little cilantro plant popped up this morning made me squeal like i'd just seen bono walking across the street.
"oh my GODDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!! cilantro!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
i then proceeded to do a little "happy cilantro dance" in the living room and run to the bedroom to get my camera. i don't think i've ever been so excited about herbs, but the fact that you cannot find cilantro (coriander) in the market or in seed form here made this quite an event this morning in the apartment.
even the cat was excited.
it's still hot as ever.... every day my students come and tell me "oh, it's going to be better tomorrow" or "yes, this weekend will be the hottest/the most humid/the worst weekend of the summer!" they've been saying this for the past 3 weeks, so i have just decided that the hot weather is here to stay.
i'm starting to plan a little holiday with okan, we're going to go to olympos or antalya for seker bayram (the holday after ramadan ends in october). i can't wait!
a bad word
one of the more interesting linguistic, language-learning phenomenons i have encountered here is that people (usually new learners of english) call black people "negros" or (god forbid) "niggers." the first time someone asked me about "niggers" in america, i almost passed out-- i was absolutely HORRIFIED that someone would:
- use this word AT ALL
- ask ME about it
- and lastly, think it was totally normal to use....
well, after discussing it with a fellow teacher from america (who had been here much longer than i) he explained to me that they hear it in rap/hip hop songs from the U.S. and it's true.... if you think about some 50 cent songs or snoop dogg or whatever, they refer to one another as "nigga" or "nigger" from time to time. but in that context, it's OK for them to say it to one another (and therefore owning language that has been tainted by history) but absolutely forbidden for someone of another race (especially caucasians) to say it back.
anyway, this came up yet again in a class i was teaching last night. we were talking about california and someone asked me about gangs. i was talking about oakland and how it's very multicultural, lots of differents colors, nationalities, traditions.... and someone piped up: "are there a lot of niggers?" i tensed up a bit, then went into a discussion about how even though they have heard this word used in pop culture, it's really, really bad to use it. they asked me a lot of questions because it was difficult to convey the weight and negative power of this word when used in american english. basically, at the end i just said, "look.... just don't use it. really. i mean it! it's so bad. SO rude."
but it is so strange to think that rap/hip hop music is spreading this word -- this word that is virtually banned from my vocabulary as an american -- and people from other cultures are picking it up, not knowing the linguistic history or weight it carries.
united 93
last night i watched "united 93." this is the film about the flight that crashed into a field on september 11, 2001. i don't know why i bought this DVD; maybe because the 5th anniversary of 9/11 is coming up, maybe because i was curious to see if they had done a respectful job making this film.... i don't know. but when i put it on, i just felt my stomach start to churn-- i just thought, "how can i watch this?"
i can say that they did a fair job portraying people with dignity and tenderness. the scenes of phone calls between the flight and loved ones were heart-breaking and difficult to watch. i can't even fathom what it must have been like on either side of those telephones.
it's strange.... five years. five years ago, our collective consciousness was shaken awake/apart by the events on september 11. it's still difficult to watch anything from that day-- if they replay the twin towers being hit or falling on TV, i have to look away. just like the challenger explosion, i just can't bear to see it again.
books and dirt
it's thursday morning. i'm sitting here with an empty yogurt container, an empty cup of coffee, and i should be ready to go. unfortunately, the lack of sleep is getting to me. it's not quite as hot as it was last week, but it's so still and humid at night that i can't sleep. i've tried sleeping on the couch (didn't work-- ended up angry at mr. bojangles because he wanted to play, but it was 3am...! then some street cats started fighting outside the living room window, so i had to get up and squirt them with the water gun).
i received a hammock for a birthday present, so i guess i could try and rig it up on the balcony, but i'm scared that the orange devil cat will come and try and get me.
so.... hot, sleepless nights turn into lethargic, overly-caffeinated days.
tomorrow is my day off (wheeeeee!) but i don't have anything planned. this is a good thing! i paid all the bills and such last week (which required trips to the bank to pay the rent, utilities, and to the post office to pay the phone bill/ADSL bill) so i am free. maybe i will go see a movie. actually, i should try and convince richard (my boss) to take me to "the american book exchange" -- which apparently consists of an older, eccentric american woman who has lived in istanbul for many years and her vast collection of books that she lets people borrow. i've been hearing about her for a long time and i am dying for an introduction. richard says she just likes meeting interesting people, having them over for tea, and then lets them borrow her books (or do a 1-1 exchange). since he's off to tasmania soonish, i should pester him about this.
in other exciting news, i need to buy dirt to plant 2 things: cilantro and basil. this is when you know you're really 30, i guess.... gardening shows suddenly seem very exciting and buying dirt to plant things is the hightlight of your odd thursday. (but the cilantro is from the US and i can spice up some mexican cooking with it!)
erenkoy
Istanbul by air
Originally uploaded by Camille L..
i woke up early this morning to travel to the asian side, to erenkoy. had the big monthly manager's meeting today, which lasted longer than expected, but was good. (well, as good as any meeting can be, i suppose!).
it's still hot as hell. this morning it was cloudy and when i looked out from my bedroom, my neighbor (an elderly woman who is always out on her balcony feeding cats) yelled "yagmur! yagmur!" (rain! rain!) i got excited and took my laundry down, but alas..... the sun quickly burned through the clouds and we had yet another insanely hot day.
now i'm home.... waiting for my friend hediye to come over so we can watch the last episode of LOST (from episode 2). ahhh dear lord. i already looked up what happens in it on the lostpedia site (nerd alert!) but i need to see it.
melting in sight of the buddha lamp
Red lights in the Tokyo Room
Originally uploaded by Camille L..
it's sunday night.... i am sitting here, pasty and orange in the light of this buddha lamp selin brought back from paris, sweating. it must be 90+ fahrenheit right now (with extra-fun humidity) and it's 11pm. mr. bojangles is passed out in a black, hair-ball clump next to my feet. i keep trying to brush him to take off the extra fur, but he takes it as a personal insult and tries to bite me. well... they say it will rain tomorrow, but i honestly can't fathom how that could be scientifically possible. i feel like istanbul has become a dry heat sauna and any rain-like moisture that could possibly fall will be zapped out of the sky by the intense heat of the sun.
but hey.... i'm from colorado, so i suppose anything is meteorologically possible. i'm no weather forecaster!
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friday night was karaoke night at klub karaoke. i sang the following songs: "my humps" (a request from the turkish girls), "chain of fools," "i still haven't found what i'm looking for," and "shoop." there were others, but everything is blurred together. i was the "karaoke hostess" and so my time was spent entering in people's requests and making sure the right people had microphones.
it was an interesting experience-- renting a private karaoke room, singing with everyone. for many of the turks in our group, it was their first time to karaoke. they loved it! whenever i entered a turkish song, it brought down the HOUSE and they went crazy. they wanted me to sing something turkish, but i wouldn't dare do that outside of my living room! i only know the chorus of one uber-popular song and every time i bust THAT out, my turkish friends about fall over laughing (and then try to teach me the rest, which i just cannot retain).
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last night, i finally finished "eat. pray. love" by elizabeth gilbert. it was a great read and i'd like to thank my friend wendie again for sending it to me! thank you, wendie!
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still sending thoughts and prayers to my middle eastern neighbors to the south.... lebanon, israel. the oil from the attacks in lebanon is spreading and causing an environmental catastrophe, soon to reach cyprus and the beaches of cyprus and turkey. that's just a blip on the radar, but this strife will grow. send good thoughts to all who are affected by this crisis.
lebanon
i don't usually write about what's going on in the greater world, but i just read an incredibly beautiful (and sad) article on salon.com about lebanon.
how lebanon rescued me i identified with the author's thoughts about leaving the U.S. and it broke my heart to read her eulogy to beirut and how beautiful it had become. i am not an expert on politics but i do know that this war is wrong. 2 israeli soldiers for thousands upon thousands of lebanese civilians? children?
then i found some other blogs from people in beirut. i don't know them, but i want to share their blogs with you:
beirut updatefrom beirut with lovewatching news on CNN drains the lifeblood out of the reality of the situations at hand. these women are real people, like you or me, facing war, facing death, facing something they were not expecting or anticipating. anderson cooper can weep all he wants on CNN but his shoddy journalism can't hold water next to lebanese people speaking out.
thursday night
hot. so hot.
the heat is making me lethargic and i really have to work to get out of the house in the morning. and now.... selin left for the US so it's just me and bojangles (or whatever the cat's name is today).
friday is my friend isilay's last day at work. i'm so sad! she's one of the smartest women i've met here-- and her life is such a conundrum. her family is extraordinarily conservative (from the caucus region) and old-fashioned (example: they don't know she's had a boyfriend for the past 4 years OR that she's been living with him). they are unaware of her life. she feels incredibly sad about this, as she holds really modern values and has a strong drive to be an independent woman, but what can she do? she's leaving work to go live with her parents about an hour and a half away from where she lives now. her boyfriend moved to the opposite side of istanbul, but they plan on continuing their relationship this way for the next 3 years. 1 year to continue working, then about 2 years while he finishes his military service. once he's back, she will introduce him to her family.... 7 years after they started dating.
so.... if you think you had it rough, just think of them. i really hope it all works out because they are both sterling people.
to say goodbye and send her off with a smile, we're going to have a karaoke party on friday night at klub karaoke, in the "tokyo" room. i have a date with my friend john to sing "up where we belong" to dear isilay, so we'll see how THAT goes.
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but most of the time i am just working. working, working, working. trying to figure out how to manage the school. it's going well, but you never know what can happen..... for example, i was having an excellent day today. lovely. perfect. everyone was smiling.... then, out of nowhere, this overwhelming, thick smell of raw sewage rolled in and took over the entire school. it was bad. real bad. so, things go well and then the sh*t rolls in-- literally, i guess.
i just want to karaoke!
